texts from deck 3

[aequoreal]

it's tfln in space, guys.
all credit for image and idea go to sun dad apollo yo

Comments

apollo

[solarcharged]

1 ) I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life

2 ) I dont know, the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him

3 ) False alarm. Still invincible.

4 ) I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your ironic use of the word yolo

5 ) It's not my fault. Someone keeps pouring me tequila shots. I don't know who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.

6 ) [ Text him some space booze-induced random nonsense ]

1 )

[magneticfields]

Why not both?

4

[ryuji]

It legit wasn't ironically used

YOLO man

diana prince | dceu | ota

[monomachy]

1) Do you usually send "hey, sexy" as a mass text?

2) I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my bunk. I must undo what I have done.

3) There is too much space vodka and too much dick.

4) I can't work your space dryer, so I'm wearing your blanket back to my bunk. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!

5) text her!

1

[tumang]

only when it's accurate
should i have personalized it

[aequoreal]

How does one accidentally abduct a cat?

3)

[magneticfields]

But only one of those is a renewable resource.

ryuji sakamoto (persona 5)

[ryuji]

1. I tried to do the Lion King thing with Lisa up in the observatory. Now I'm just kinda sitting here with bandaids, a ton of scratches, and wondering why the hell in the world I didn't just take Simba-chan and do it with him instead.

2. You dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now

3. My 6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever...

4. HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW WHY A BURRITO IS FLOATING AROUND OUT THERE

5. [or make something up]

4

[tumang]

didn't you make it?

amos

[tumang]

i. Learn some fucking English or fuck off. "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".

ii. Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina

iii. I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.

iv. She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".

v. Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England

2

[morethan084]

Wrong person.

Nice to know you're looking out for her I guess.

it's a meme i do what i want

[donkeyballs]

She is not grindin' my thigh.

There just ain't a lot of places to sit.

5

[rickitikitarr]

Amos that's my childhood you're casually ruining

iii.

[oddbod]

It's been fifteen. Did you get lost? Did you fall out the airlock?

ii.

[monomachy]

I don't know if I should be offended you thought I needed the help or flattered you care so much.

kovacs

[resleeves]

1) i think we sleep fucked last night...

2) I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion

3) Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need

4) did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?

5) Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster

6) Text him

3

[morethan084]

...

Thanks for sharing.

alex kamal

[donkeyballs]

1. You kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothin' happened...

2. Just gave my liver a 'good luck and I'm sorry' speech.

3. Friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and I'm not leaving you behind. Ohana means family.

4. Why is your signature on my underwear?

5. Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.

5

[tumang]

who are they? i'm not going lower than an 8

vanessa ives

[possidetur]

one ) Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?

two ) You went over there?

three ) Thanks for the hospitality last night.

2

[resleeves]

i go where i want.

why, you worried about me?

ricki

[rickitikitarr]

1. New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.

2. FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot

Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.

3. obviously you're part succubus.

4. Dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me

4.

[donkeyballs]

Yeah, and the girl on my left keeps givin' me the stink eye every time I say anythin'.

Erik Lehnsherr | XCU | OTA

[magneticfields]

1. It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
2. Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
3. I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
4. Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
5. Text him!

3

[resleeves]

it's okay.

i still think you're a bitch despite your ability to talk too much.

clara

[oddbod]

a. Found a communicator. In my freezer. Wrapped in bologna. Explain?

b. A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women.

c. I'm sorry you wanted to get laid and all I did was play with my cat instead.

d. Oh, like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine.

b

[donkeyballs]

You tryin' to tell me that my stares aren't tasteful?

bodhi rook | star wars rogue one

[onlydoubts]

1. False alarm, still single

2. Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 25 I’ll stop doing that

3. No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.

4. On the bright side, no one died.

5. I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many people hitting on me. I dont know what to do.

6. text him!

4.

[magneticfields]

No one that we know, anyway.

Mike Slattery

[charlieoscar]

1.) Not only did you rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... Never do this again.

2.) That's because I've spent my life convincing everyone the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.

2.) I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink.

3.) Your creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it.

4.) I mean metaphorically. Literal zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.

5.) I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.

6.) Text him!

kylo ren

[warfares]

1. Can you repeat that, but with context?
2. He bit me. It was rude. A reaction was called for.
3. I really want to know why half of my floor is missing.
4. And you kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there.
5. Text him.

2

[possidetur]

Are you alright?

( because she figures that the other guy isn't-- )

revan

[warcried]

1. People and things I regret. That's what I want to do tonight.
2. Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your day.
3. You walked up, smiled, stroked my beard, then just left.
4. Where are you? I hear explosions and you've gone missing. I'm sure that's not coincidence.
5. [ text him ]

4.

[magneticfields]

Everything's perfectly all right now. We're fine. We're all fine here, now, thank you. How are you?